The Right Question

15 Dec 2024

KING: “Jester, why are there so many problems in my Kingdom? Why is my kingdom in such a mess?”

JESTER:” Your Majesty it’s not that we don’t already have all the right solutions and answers to those problems.”

KING:” What do you mean? If you already have the solutions, why don’t you use them and put them into practice?”

JESTER: “Your Majesty, correct answers are useless, superfluous even, when therearen’t enough people asking the right questions.”

Another year almost over. Our minds full of the clutter of daily life. If you’re like me there is a longing for some solitude, some respite, not only from the demands that our external world make upon us, but also from what the Buddhists call avidya, the ignorance that comes from placing the ego at the centre of life.

But how does one go about not placing the ego at the centre of life? I must admit for me this has been a lifelong struggle which remains unresolved. I’d like to blame everything and everybody apart from myself for this. My parents who stoked my ambitious personality, my schooling which encouraged success, the zeitgeist which favours materialism, fame and fortune above all else, and the polarisation of our contemporary society where you are either strongly with us or strongly against us.

It is only in moments away from all the noise and hubbub, that I draw breath and see it all for what it really is. A necessary but disconsolating vortex of temptations, promises and deceptions that make up the detours around what is really important. The philosopher Heidegger called this phenomenon (which we all share), “the forgetting of Being”.

So where else is there to go? What escapes from the ego are on offer in this our secular age where shamans and snake oil salesmen, entrepreneurs and smooth-talking life coaches, abound?

The answer of course to the seductive brouhaha of our contemporary times, is the perennial gift, which we have in one way or another all been given. (Although most of us struggle to even unpack the wrapping paper within which it comes). And this is the inward journey, the ultimate antidote to the overachieving life.

What do I mean by the inward journey? Well, the professionals could answer that question better than me. Take the Trappist monks and nuns who believe in the power of deep contemplative prayer and who pursue it wholeheartedly by limiting small talk, obeying the vows of chastity and having little to do with the outside world.

But personally, I have never aspired to monkhood. The monastic life was never for me. Even though I am extremely grateful for the various meditation retreats I have endured over the years with all their deprivations and challenges, such a permanent and ultimately disciplined lifestyle is not my thing. (And the various gurus I have met along the way have taught me that wisdom and bullshit make strange and irritating bedfellows).

No, I am by nature a householder. And as such I have relished the wonderful delights the world has offered me. My marriage, my children, my dog, my house, my work, my colleagues, and my friends. Not to mention nature. In most traditional visions of human development this approach to life is essential, fulfilling the needs of both the individual and society. I know that the world keeps changing and these views are not necessarily universal. But my work as a psychiatrist has taught me that although there are many ways to live a life, a happy family orientated existence engenders joy and a certain confidence and savoir faire.

So I’ve chosen what is often known as the middle way or path. Live in the world with all it myriad (but often lovely) distractions and at the same understand that there are other helpful and nurturing ways of looking at the world and all that it contains.

I love metaphysics too but in small doses. After all, seeing the world with too much light can be just as isolating as seeing it with too little. For three or four centuries, bar a Hegel here and a Rousseau there, few great philosophers got married: not Leibniz, Descartes, Hume, Kant, Spinoza, Locke, Kierkegaard, Schopenhauer, Nietzsche or Wittgenstein. In all likelihood, being in possession of blazing metaphysical insight led to their apartness.

Now obviously seeking enlightenment sitting in a cave or ashram under a Bodhi tree is a lot easier than finding enlightenment driving the kids to school in peak hour traffic. No question about that. Indeed, it is well recognised that the householder’s lot is not an easy one. But let’s face it enlightenment is a rather nebulous term, or as Van Morrison put it: “Enlightenment, don’t know what it is”.

So maybe when I describe the inner journey, (and I’m being necessarily vague here), I should be using the term awakening and emphasising that awakening is a process, a journey through life, with no absolute destination. Its different for everyone, even the monks. But for the householder, and I’m assuming you’re one too, the inner quest, the coming to terms with the ego and seeking what is beyond, can be a valuable, although an obviously hard to achieve, enhancer of everyday life.

And let’s forget about McMindfulness. My intention here is to discuss ego deflation not inflation. So the enhancement of every day life through contemplation to my way of thinking is about self-understanding, humility, integrity and world acceptance. Its not about some timetabled well-being program that facilitates longevity, a better attitude and more productivity and success in the workplace.

So, if you’re lucky enough to have some regular quiet time to yourself, away from the hustle and bustle, you will also need some self-discipline. And if you’re fortunate enough to have that too, the inward journey (at least the one I have chosen), is not hard to describe, but it is incredibly difficult to master.

What it takes is a retraining or de-conditioning of your mind. That is you must attempt to deconceptualize and dissolve all notions that your thinking might come up with. Witness your mind and let the thoughts and associated emotions that arise move on. Simple really. Like clouds in the sky, just watch your thoughts and images float by and do not invest in them or refute them. Acceptance is the key.

I will say no more because I’m not here to teach anyone the art of meditation. Suffice to emphasize that this approach is easy to paraphrase but bloody hard to achieve. Of course, what I think is helpful to lower the pressure in the boiler room of the mind, is certainly not recommended or suitable for everyone. Even that old mixed-up rascal Aldous Huxley in his book “The Perennial Philosophy” acknowledged that in the world of enlightenment or awakening or transformation or whatever you want to call it, there are different strokes for different folks. Personality, upbringing, culture all play a role in whether you find peace or flow or bliss in physical pursuits such as tai chi or dance, creative pursuits such as music or art, or contemplative pursuits such as prayer or meditation. The list is infinite.

And so is the goal.

In essence what I’m trying to say is that an active life is to a certain extent useless without the resources that contemplation offers. We live in unholy times where belief and faith are controversial. Where fundamentalist ideologies lead to horrible atrocities. Where the lack of genuine selfless faith leads to greed, deception and corrupt inequality. Where the battle between narcissism and nihilism seems to be approaching a tipping point whose outcome is impossible to predict. Not to mention climate change.

Maybe it’s always been like this. Unstable times with an apocalyptic flavour. But whether I’m right or wrong it’s helpful to have one’s own way of dealing with the noise, whether or not the volume has been turned up recently. A personal belief system, be it religious, mythological, animistic, philosophic or whatever needs to be reinforced by some habitual practice that is sustaining experientially. Theory together with practice if you like. It is this crucial combination which to my way of thinking, is the royal road to what the Greeks called eudaimonia, even if we never quite arrive there in the end.

Taking it a step further into my impossible dream is that everyone in the world decides to be open and honest about what they truly believe in. But wait a minute. When I think about it many of us have no understanding of any of this. Many others couldn’t care less. And many don’t see any importance in even considering such a question. That’s OK to my way of thinking. My response to that is that those of us who do attempt to honestly face up to this question and find answers, are probably going to cope with both the joys and vicissitudes of life much more effectively.

However, in the end behind all the complexities of belief systems and what they do and don’t enshrine, is a much more important and basic question which DOES need to be answered by everyone, particularly those who make the most noise. It is a question which ultimately underscores how well we as individuals and also our society, our culture, and indeed our whole civilisation, is doing. And that question is

“What are your principles?”

Because principles presuppose ethics. An ethical person has a lot of principles. But ethics seem to be in very short supply at the moment. Which, looked at through even simple eyes, would explain a lot about the direction much of the world is heading.

So, the trouble is that the above question doesn’t seem to get asked much anymore. It’s not that we don’t have the answers. Principles include honesty, courage, integrity, humility, love, responsibility, discipline and service.

They are there for all those who wish to see. But if we as human beings are not encouraged to seek them out, they will not be found. And so, we consequently sink beneath the weight of populist politicians, warmongers, greedy entrepreneurs, social media moguls, climate change deniers and gangster dictators.

We already have the answers but not enough of us are asking the right question.

To quote Einstein:

“If I had an hour to solve a problem and my life depended on

the solution, I would spend the first 55 minutes determining the

right question to ask….for once I know the proper question, I

could solve the problem in less than 5 minutes”

By Dr Nigel Strauss